If you want the full story feel free to click on the webpage and knock yourself out. The shortened version is that we read and review SVU fanfic published on ff.net (and sometimes svufiction.com) and try to get people to improve in their writing. We don't do that so much any more. Mostly we just mock now. Love us, hate us, think we're arrogant pricks, we don't really care.
Rules Apparently we need them now.
No introductory posts without badfic. No posts without fic at all, actually. We're here for the mocking, not discussion of your newbie status or how much you didn't like last night's episode. At the moment, over 80 people have this comm on their f-list. It's not a whole hell of a lot, but that's still a significant number of people you're bothering. Moral of the story: mocking good, off-topic bad.
If you are new, be aware that we sometimes eat our own. If you act dumber than the folks you're mocking, we're likely to turn on you instead. Also be aware that we may -- somewhere down the line -- become friendly with those we mock. Everyone has the potential to rise above badness and pettiness. This includes us. Everyone remember the famous case of Candi v. SVUCC? Yeah, thought so. If you don't, just act like you're in the know; it'll make you look old skool.
If you're going to troll, please do so creatively. It gets boring if all we get is "OMG u guys are so mean!" We've heard it all before and honestly? We don't give a rat's ass. If you are going to use the "it's just fanFICTION" argument, please realize you're emphasizing the wrong part of the word and go about your business.
Don't friendslock an entry unless you think someone will come after you with a gun for posting it. We're not here to mock privately and if you can't take the heat for what you're saying, don't post it.
Don't go flaming the author of a fic posted here. Reporting things at FFN that are reportable is fair game, but don't be stupid about the reviews. It's not fun to click on a story link and find that the story is gone because of flames; we can't mock what we can't read. If they want to take concrit as a flame, that's their issue, but don't deliberately attack the author.
Use LJ-cuts. LJ-cuts are good and we love them. Don't know how to use them? Find out. If you're posting something that's a paragraph or less, you don't have to bother, but why not go for more snarkage and a cut?
If the fic is in an LJ entry, DO NOT LINK TO IT. It is technically a violation of the LJ TOS in that context, and I'll delete it the instant I see it. And you might get your ass kicked out too.
If you are an author and you would like the post containing your fic to be removed, just e-mail speshulduck at email@example.com. I'll post it for the rest of the community to laugh at and you can go fuck yourself.
Wanna Report Something? First of all, you need to join the community. We'll have no stupid trolls making posts here unless it's in the comments. The comm is set to "Non-Members cannot post" and that isn't going to change. Membership isn't moderated, so go ahead and join. If you don't have an LJ, go get one. It's easier to keep track of people that way, especially if you're funny.
Second, ask yourself if there's really anything worth snarking on in the fic you've set your sights on. Bad grammar? Awful spelling? Yes, these thing are funny, but they'll only get you so far. Hilarious character name-mangles, bizarre characterization, complete disregard for canon? These things can get funny, and we want to hear your snark! Found an author that seems to think Olivia has a younger sister who is Elliot and Olivia's third partner? We definitely want to hear you snark on that.
Third, as stated in the rules, we don't care what you thought of last night's episode. Please don't tell us unless it has some bearing on the fic you're posting. Or if it's part of some brilliant meta on SVU fic. The creator likes meta and will make exceptions for it.
Fourth, check the recent entries to see if it's been posted before.
Fifth, do some mocking and some snarking in the entry. It'll make you feel good, I promise.